Sunday, April 8, 2012

Choosing My Battles

A life lesson I have not thought much about in the past is "choosing my battles". I am one of those people that practices this valuable caution, but I'd never really thought about the importance of it until recently; it seems like every time I turn around lately I want to look so many people in the face and scream "Choose your battles! This is not worth it!"

It all started a couple weeks ago on facebook. I am a very firm believer in keeping drama out of social media sites. I also think that some things honestly are not the business of the world and shouldn't be shared so publicly. A "friend" on facebook (I use quotes because she's an acquaintance) decided that her status was the best place to discuss her relationship issues. Someone pointed out (nicely in my opinion) that facebook wasn't the place to discuss such a private issue--the war was on! It turned into a giant issue between everyone posting comments as it will do on social media sites. Everyone was either defending the boyfriend or defending her and bashing the boyfriend or telling her that facebook wasn't the place to address it.

This situation made me realize that I have way more respect for AJ than that. I strongly believe that if you have an issue with your "other half" then it should remain between the two of you. Whether it's venting to a friend, mentioning to my mom an issue I have with him, or putting him on blast on facebook-it is not for me. I realize that I love him so much that even though I may be frustrated with him at the time, but I will forgive him. We will be okay because I love him, but my friends/family will always have the thoughts in the back of their minds of when he hurt me. Even if I'm over it, it may change their view of him, and that is not my desire. I also have more respect for him as a man to not put something that I think he "did wrong" all over facebook. He, as the love of my life, does not deserve to be treated that way by anyone--especially me.

The next situation that taught me this important lesson was my employees. It seems like the story of my life at work is choosing my battles. I realize that my staff is not perfect and there are thousands of little things I might do differently or would change about the way things happen, but that does not mean that every single thing every single time will get pointed out by me. I've realized that there is "more than one way to skin at cat" and as long as they are properly doing their job there are a few things that can be overlooked in order to keep up morale. So, I choose carefully which battles I choose to fight... which I as the manager will win. haha.

Just a little rambling that's been on my mind lately...

8 comments:

  1. Very good point. I can't stand when people use facebook or any social media site to call others out. It is SO unnecessary! I think the people that do things like that are the ones that are thriving for attention. Just a personal thought. Choosing your battles is something I think we learn more and more about the older we get. Sometimes the drama isn't worth it, and I wish everyone would realize that. Life's too short to bicker over the little things that won't matter years from now.

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    1. yeah... the facebook one sent me over the edge... lol I don't have time for that kind of drama in my life... so it's probably a good thing the girl "un-friended" me within about 24 hours--and I didn't even comment on the subject... however I did "like" the comment someone posted that said "facebook isn't the place to discuss this"... guess she didn't like that... probably removed everyone who didn't play into her plea for attention that day... lol oh well... like I said we were only acquaintances anyway... so no big loss... just a little less drama on my news feed lol

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  2. I have to tell you I used to be the queen of social media drama. I didn't realize how bad it made me look. I thought I was just venting, but I was speaking terribly about my husband. I look back and cringe. I would throw him under the bus at every chance I got. He finally called me out about it one day and made me realize how it looked and how it made him feel. I have gotten much, much better about sharing our marriage in blogs & on FB. A couple of weeks ago I made a major mistake and vented my frustration about our soccer team on FB. I was so mad at myself after I did it. Thank you for the reminder to keep my venting in check!!

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    1. The soccer thing actually did not bother me as much on fb as the girl venting about the father of her child... I just know how hard it is to get words back after they've been spoken...especially if they've been put on the internet where u can never truly get them "back"...

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    2. Ooopppss! I did that recently as well. :-) I'm screwing up left & right. ;-) I used to think that no one read what I wrote anyway so it didn't matter. Boy was I wrong. Now I have lists and depending on what the subject matter is only certain people can see it. The soccer thing bothered me. I'm the president of the clubs wife and I'm the coaches wife. What I put out there about our team, no matter how much it ticked me off to see 5 kids play themselves into a heat stroke, is important and I really need to make sure nothing like that happens again.

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    3. I was upset for you when I read the soccer post. I could tell you were upset, and it wasn't fair to the poor kids who played their hearts out bc other parent's didn't want to be bothered with bringing their kids to the games. This was not by any means a personal attack or for you to feel bad about what you post. More of a reminder to myself to be careful what I say/post bc some bells cannot be un-rung... Hoping the soccer situation is better for you and ur hubby... and good luck on ur goal for better censorship lol.. :-)

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    4. I totally know you didn't mean me in anyway. That would be pretty self centered of me. Thank you for the good luck because I will probably need it!

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    5. lol... I also do not think you are self centered lol... :-)

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